A New York BigFoot and an Ass whoopin

Well, the western NY area was a buzz in the cryptozoological world. One world where i'm happy to say I love being a part of. I had gotten a phone call at 2 in the morning a few weeks ago about people seeing a "large hairy bigfoot looking thing" roaming around Clarence NY. Which is less than an hour from here. I have to say I got a bit excited, and was ready to hop into the car that moment and go investigate. Which isn't the first time i have literally leaped into a car to drive for a cryptohunt on a moments notice. but, at this point I was unable to go due to house guests and such... Which probably was a good thing, since I waited till the next morning and called around searching for more answers. And answers are what I found, in the form of photos emailed to me showing what was causing all the excitement. (seen below). Hence the ass whoopin... lots of beers, a camera and a spare monkey suit... I really hate those that do things like this. Makes all of us feel stupid when we actually think that it might be true, even on the smallest of levels.

I will give even the most blatent fake a chance at one of my world famous critiques...

So, here ya go...

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Dear Sir,
Thank you for sending these photos, here is our opinion of the images you had sent and reportedly captured in your own back yard.Official breakdown and initial opinions:multiple pictures sent... showing a dark humanoid figure. Of these photos it shows the "creature" moving away from the John Deer Gator. 2 out of 3 have him "fleeing" the same way. I have to say, not many creatures flee from a photographer, just to turn around and go back to the same point and flee in the opposite direction. (unless said creature might have dropped it's iPod, or maybe some form of ID).head to body ration... very human. Arm length short for any of the great apes... about human length, especially in the forearm area where most great apes length of limbs is found.the line from the elbow to the hand is not smooth... bump around the wrist area. This is not a natural line, when all primates have straight lines there.... that is unless the great ape is wearing long sleeved shirt with gloves on causing an overlap. And seeing that there is no snow on the ground, I doubt that this "bigfoot" was feeling that cold.in conclusion, I would like to thank the person responsible for taking these photos and renting the monkey suit. Yes, a hardly thank you for wasting the time of R.I.P (Rochester Investigators into the Paranormal), and getting us excited that there might actually have been a cryptozoological mystery in NY state. This will no doubt help solidify the credibility of all those who take this work to be real, as well as help influence possible funding of the scientific community to further study these mysteries. I would like to point out that the previous sentence was filled with an over abundance of sarcasm. We will be sure to add these photos and your name to a future article on our site www.kornyPig.com. Just to make sure that you get pestered and harassed as much as those that had decided to investigate mysteries such as this with a serious tone.
Thank you,
Magnus
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